HOLY SHIT NEWS! #65

madassgamer · Mon Mar 27, 2017 7:46 am

Hell-O & Whalecum to the 65th edition of HSN!

- "Democrats are smiling in D.C. that the Freedom Caucus, with the help of Club For Growth and Heritage, have saved Planned Parenthood & Ocare!" Straight from Trump's Twitter. Yes, the plan to repeal Obamacare had failed... For now *dun dun duuuuuuuuuuuuun*. Well, not that dramatic, but anyway. The battle for Obamacare's replacement is still going on.

- 1 dead and 15 wounded in a Cincinnati Nightclub Shooting. Not even a year after Harambe's death and people still getting shot in that fuck up City!!! O'Bryan Spikes was the shooter and according to authorities, this was not an act of terror. Still, what happened was terrible and dicks out to all!

- Finally, I'm going to be reviewing the new movie, Saban's Power Rangers. For a non-spoiler review, Still a better experience and tribute than Megaforce!

Now for the real movie review with SPOILERS!!!

Spoiler: show: The Movie starts with Zordon in physical form as the Red Ranger fallen with his other team mates dead, with the Green Ranger gone evil. The Green Ranger being Rita Repulsa. Years down the road, we get our main characters in detention Jason, who got into a wreck doing stupid shit and is now under house arrest, Kimberly, who is Jason's love interest here and is bitched at be the other girls for leaking nudes or something, and Billy, who is now African American and is Autistic in this version. He is then picked on by a bully (not Bulk or Skull) and is quickly bitch slapped by Jason.

Billy thanks him and takes Jason to his House to disable the Ankle Monitor. They all then go to the quarry as Billy was searching for stuff there. They also meet Zack, who is Asian in this version and who's mother is dying, and Trini, who is implied to be Lesbian in this version. So, this is more diverse than Ghostbusters 2016 HA! Anyway, they find the Power Coins and are spotted by the Guards at the quarry. They do a hilarious chase and manage to get away, but with the Van totaled. We see on the docks that fishermen find Rita's body and is awoken. She is now on the loose raising hell and collecting Gold to create Goldar.

The Teens see that they now have Super-Human abilities and go back to the quarry to find out what's going on. Billy finds something under water and they all go down, only to find some sort of lair. They are then greeted by Alpha 5, who they think is an enemy. He explains the Coins a little bit to them and soon he introduces the Teens to Zordon. Zordon explains that with the Coins, they can transform into the Power Rangers. He explains that they have to become Rangers in 11 days or else Rita will make Goldar and will find the Zeo Crystal which will destroy the Earth.

They find out that the Rangers can't Morph, so they have to train them in a pit with Holographic Putties. After training and training and more training. They still can't Morph. Later, Alpha introduces the Rangers to the Zords, large machines based off Dinosaurs. Zack, takes the Mastodon for a joy ride, almost killing the Rangers. Jason and hum get into a fist fight, with Billy breaking them up and causing him to Morph, then Demorphing when Zack touched him. Zordon then asks if they had Morphed yet, with them telling him that Billy had morphed, with him not being able to again. He then send them home.

All of them leave, except Jason, who listens in on Him and Alpha, only to find out that Zordon wants the Morphing Grid to open so he can regain his physical form. Feeling as he was used, Jason trash talks Zordon then leaves. The Rangers then get to know each other some more and there characters develop more. Later, Trini is attacked by Rita in her bed and tells the others. Now believing that Rita is real now, they go to the docks to beat the shit outta her, but fail. She then asks Billy where the Zeo Crystal is located where he reveals it's beneath the Krispy Kreme (yay advertisement) She then kills Billy as the go back to Zordon, pleading that they become Rangers to stop her. While all this is going on, the Grid opens, giving Zordon a chance to regain his physical form. Only to use it to bring Billy back to life.

They now try one more time to Morph and succeed. They kick Putty ass and with an amazing fight scene with Zack using his Zord against them. Seeing Goldar on the loose, they use their Zords for the final battle, all while Go Go Power Rangers is playing. With Putties all over and Goldar terrorizing the City, the Rangers kick ass. However their fire power isn't enough to take out Goldar. He then Trashes the Zords and throws them into the pit where the Zeo Crystal is located. However, before they fall, the Zords merge with themselves to form the Megazord. The Megazord and Goldar have a pretty good fight, with the Megazord going full blown Brock Lesnar on Goldar, taking him to Suplex City.

They then throw Goldar into the pit and knock Rita into Space. We then get a cameo for PR originals, JDF and AJJ as the Rangers celebrate. We also get an after credits scene with a new student, a certain Tommy Oliver.

Overall, I thought the movie was great! A nice mix of edge and comedy. Billy was the most entertaining with his quirks and funny moments. Each of the Rangers feel genuine and act like real Teenagers. I also liked how they used past objects such as the Zeo Crystal as a plot for the film. Plus, several references to past seasons suck as mentioning Reefside and Mariner Bay.

Not to mention, they full blown roast Transformers, by throwing a Chevy Camaro into the monsters while saying "Sorry Bumblebee". Plus, this movie USES the theme song, unlike the Transformers movies, HA!

It does take them a bit to finally Morph and get into action, but overall, it's not boring *cough*Batman Vs. Superman*cough*

I hope the movie gets a sequel and continues down the path its going, I give it an 8/10

This is the madassgamer and I'm gonna shoot some Putties in Ohio, and them not having health care!

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HOLY SHIT NEWS! #65

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