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 Ladies And Gentlemen, My Favorite Food... 
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Post Ladies And Gentlemen, My Favorite Food...
Is schadenfreude.

http://www.fmylife.com/

Today, I had a going-away party because I am leaving the country forever. Out of the 130 people invited, 60 were a resounding "Yes! of course I will go!". After paying $300 for everything needed at the party, 2 ended up coming. And left because nobody else was there. FML

Today, I was eating dinner. At a restaurant. Alone. At a table set for twelve. My family had stayed home to watch the replays of the football and didn't think to tell me. REPLAYS. They saw the LIVE GAME last week. I left after about an hour, and people applauded as I walked out. FML

Today, my girlfriend and I had sex for the first time. When I was on top of her, she asked me if it was in yet. I said yes. She sighed. FML


Post your favorite FMLs -OR- discuss how delicious other people's misery is. Your call, FH :)



Today, my lesbian sister enthusiastically showed me her new strap on. Not only does she get more girls than me, she now has a bigger penis too. FML


Fri Jun 19, 2009 11:28 pm
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Post Re: Ladies And Gentlemen, My Favorite Food...
Here are really good ones:

Today, one of my good friends confided in me about the affair she is having with our boss. She'd been sleeping with him for 3 months and told me they were in love, but it had to be kept quiet due to our company's very strict anti-fraternization policy . I'd been secretly seeing him all year. FML

Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML

Today, my mother found condoms in my room. She asked why and I said "Just in case." She started laughing hysterically. FML

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Y0u've a11 g0ne ins@ane @nd 1'm just laughing at y0u


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Wed Jun 24, 2009 12:30 am
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