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 Waiting. 
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Post Waiting.
Laying in bed wondering what today will be like. I just have to keep motivated until I start my higher paying job. It's so hard getting out of bed when you're depressed.
———
That was this morning before going to work. At work I figured out what's depressing me. I'm going to be poor for two more months. I don't start my new job until the end of next month and then I still have to wait to get paid. I'm helpless in the sense that even though I'm already on the right path I'm stuck waiting.

Like I ordered a new life and I'm checking the mail every two minutes hoping that it's there this time. I should be happy but instead I feel that I'm unable to actively change anything right now.

To make things worse, here I am blathering about it on the internet because the people I have available to talk about this just keep trying to fix the fact that I'm depressed. This isn't a flat tire, there's nothing to fix. I'll be fine in time, I just need to vent. Living life takes its toll and it's really just that simple.

I want to have fun again. Did you know when I was a civilian I used to go dumpster diving on the weekends for fun? Me and three or four other guys would go around our small town and loot dumpsters behind tech spots for all kinds of crap. We'd then have what we called our "emergency bar-bee-ques" which were zero-notice, set-shit-on-fire events with food of various sorts. We'd have sword fights with cardboard tubes, play something which could be mistaken for volleyball (if you were blind and retarded) and then we might end up in a two or three day long LAN party which wouldn't end until school started Monday morning. Hell, this is just a snowflake in Antarctica compared to all the fun I used to have. I was constantly doing all sorts of shit.

Now I stare at a small computer screen and think about what I'm missing out on. I don't know anything about the current state of the gaming world or tech world at all. I'm so far out of the loop I feel like Rip Van Winkle.

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In just under one-thousand eight-bit bytes I have to confer some glorious shrine to myself by means of text, images, hyper links, embeded flash compositions and possibly formatting. I could abuse this easily. Ten hour clips on youtube embeded in a single vertical stack. Multi-megapixel long transparent GIFs causing scrollbar hell. Nuero-linguistic programs that fuck your mind like a fresh squid. Eye raping color schemes using ascii full-width blocks. Images or links to images of things that can not be unseen. Anything called "epilepsy" dot SWF. This is what I want to do. I am not a good person. I just know that would be a flagrant display of disrespect. I'll wait until I can get away with it.
NOW IN GLORIOUS TODD A.O.!
fluffco™ LLC takes no responsibility for anything, ever, at all, under any circumstances and is entirely fictional outside Colorado.


Sat Aug 16, 2014 5:17 pm
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Post Re: Waiting.
Let's start by doing something. You got them Negima Episodes?

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Sat Aug 16, 2014 5:20 pm
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Post Re: Waiting.
Yeah.

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In just under one-thousand eight-bit bytes I have to confer some glorious shrine to myself by means of text, images, hyper links, embeded flash compositions and possibly formatting. I could abuse this easily. Ten hour clips on youtube embeded in a single vertical stack. Multi-megapixel long transparent GIFs causing scrollbar hell. Nuero-linguistic programs that fuck your mind like a fresh squid. Eye raping color schemes using ascii full-width blocks. Images or links to images of things that can not be unseen. Anything called "epilepsy" dot SWF. This is what I want to do. I am not a good person. I just know that would be a flagrant display of disrespect. I'll wait until I can get away with it.
NOW IN GLORIOUS TODD A.O.!
fluffco™ LLC takes no responsibility for anything, ever, at all, under any circumstances and is entirely fictional outside Colorado.


Sat Aug 16, 2014 5:29 pm
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Post Re: Waiting.
Allright - in episode 2, they hold a party in the dorm thingy area. I need some pics of the crowd there.

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Sat Aug 16, 2014 5:31 pm
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Lord Cumdrops
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Post Re: Waiting.
Timesinks my friend, timesinks. There are a fuckload of them, so put your hand into that pile and grope something out that will pass the time until your life starts. :)

You at least have something you're waiting on, an end to the tunnel. Playing random games to make a few months go away or watching anime for 2 months straight is easy done xD.

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Sat Aug 16, 2014 8:18 pm
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Post Re: Waiting.
LordofFlames wrote:
Timesinks my friend, timesinks. There are a fuckload of them, so put your hand into that pile and grope something out that will pass the time until your life starts. :)

You at least have something you're waiting on, an end to the tunnel. Playing random games to make a few months go away or watching anime for 2 months straight is easy done xD.


And you, have a certain thread you need to reply in. :)

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Sat Aug 16, 2014 9:39 pm
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Post Re: Waiting.
LordofFlames wrote:
Timesinks my friend, timesinks. There are a fuckload of them, so put your hand into that pile and grope something out that will pass the time until your life starts. :)

You at least have something you're waiting on, an end to the tunnel. Playing random games to make a few months go away or watching anime for 2 months straight is easy done xD.

I watch and play things non-stop. I also code, engineer and write continuously. I have a degree in philosophy for the field of wasting time and give lectures every Tuesday at a fictional university, you've probably never heard of it.

I want for substance with which to fill the void.

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In just under one-thousand eight-bit bytes I have to confer some glorious shrine to myself by means of text, images, hyper links, embeded flash compositions and possibly formatting. I could abuse this easily. Ten hour clips on youtube embeded in a single vertical stack. Multi-megapixel long transparent GIFs causing scrollbar hell. Nuero-linguistic programs that fuck your mind like a fresh squid. Eye raping color schemes using ascii full-width blocks. Images or links to images of things that can not be unseen. Anything called "epilepsy" dot SWF. This is what I want to do. I am not a good person. I just know that would be a flagrant display of disrespect. I'll wait until I can get away with it.
NOW IN GLORIOUS TODD A.O.!
fluffco™ LLC takes no responsibility for anything, ever, at all, under any circumstances and is entirely fictional outside Colorado.


Sat Aug 16, 2014 11:51 pm
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Post Re: Waiting.
Lives are fun. I prefer them in short, violent bursts that make me not want them for a week or two after.

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Oh fuck off

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Sun Aug 17, 2014 1:55 am
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Post Re: Waiting.
I found a minifridge and left one of my phones charging all night in it. It was nice and cool when I woke up. I've given it a lot of thought and I think I'm going to decide to delve into a project that will keep me sparse online for a few weeks. I'll see everyone on the other side.

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In just under one-thousand eight-bit bytes I have to confer some glorious shrine to myself by means of text, images, hyper links, embeded flash compositions and possibly formatting. I could abuse this easily. Ten hour clips on youtube embeded in a single vertical stack. Multi-megapixel long transparent GIFs causing scrollbar hell. Nuero-linguistic programs that fuck your mind like a fresh squid. Eye raping color schemes using ascii full-width blocks. Images or links to images of things that can not be unseen. Anything called "epilepsy" dot SWF. This is what I want to do. I am not a good person. I just know that would be a flagrant display of disrespect. I'll wait until I can get away with it.
NOW IN GLORIOUS TODD A.O.!
fluffco™ LLC takes no responsibility for anything, ever, at all, under any circumstances and is entirely fictional outside Colorado.


Mon Aug 18, 2014 10:01 am
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Post Re: Waiting.
Goodnight, fluffy. See ya on the other side - oh and get those pics for me, ok?

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Mon Aug 18, 2014 1:04 pm
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Post Re: Waiting.
Fluffy, I used to have the same problem, people think I'm depressed but I'm just stressed out from worrying about worries and ends meeting up.

This phrase can help, next time you find your self worrying tell your self "ehn, fuck it, what do I want to do today" or think up some wild scheme of some supernatural way you could get it done if you had powers.

Immagination can be a wonderful friend to keep your mind preoccupied from worrying about the "to bes".

I tend to let my immagination run on wild ideas that deal with my "hobby profession", I pick something hard and think about it for hours.

I am sure you have "hobby professions" most of us have them as dreams of grandure that we think are impossible but we still try.

look at me, I always wanted to be a videogame developer, It's still technically not a reality but I work hard at it, and I admitt I slack off periodically I just get these urges to play or reenvision old games, so eventualy I can't resist and just go for it, yeah it destracts me from my main project but when I go back to the main project I'll have more vigour.

Been playing SNES games lately, games were so much better back then in gameplay content and atmosphere, why do they all suck so bad now? can you answer that fluffy?

also if you want to meet up I'll be in the states in 2 days. I'll also be stopping over in South korea on the way home need to change flights, it's not near the capital though.

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got any?

His name is not Robert Paulsen, His name is Gregory Matthew Bruni, he won so hard.

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Thu Aug 21, 2014 3:59 am
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Post Re: Waiting.
If you see a house with a large yard out in the suburbs, and a steel door, drop on by.

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Thu Aug 21, 2014 8:03 am
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Post Re: Waiting.
I'll be flying through Inchon international airport, got just over 3 hours between flights, probably not even long enough to leave the airport and reenter lol.

so you might be wondering why I'm not using my starcraft.. well a couple buddies got nabbed by NASA'a new exterior cameras on the ISS.. I'm not letting the same thing happen to me. when in rome do as the romans do.

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mepsipax

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His name is not Robert Paulsen, His name is Gregory Matthew Bruni, he won so hard.

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Thu Aug 21, 2014 8:34 am
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Post Re: Waiting.
Would you like to purchase optical stealth tech? I don't usually sell to people - but for a fellow forkhead, I'll make an exception.

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Thu Aug 21, 2014 10:00 am
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FH Clairvoyant
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Post Re: Waiting.
Why there's so many negative attitude lately?
If I were to find a better paying job and could start it in two moth I would be thinking like "sweet, in next two months there will be some extra flood of cash" instead of "omg, there's still two months and I will be poor all this time".
But wait, from this perspective it means that you were poor for a long time before this opportunity surfaced, so you should have got used to this standard over time, so it's not a big deal to keep up with it for a little bit longer, right?

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Sun Aug 24, 2014 12:40 am
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