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 the forkheads adventuring company 

what should the first adventure be
go help some farmers with a goblin problem 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
go root out a goblin lair 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
go rescue a good goblin from his evil tribe 50%  50%  [ 1 ]
escort a wagon through goblin heavy teritory 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
other (please specify must involve goblins) 50%  50%  [ 1 ]
Total votes : 2

 the forkheads adventuring company 
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Post the forkheads adventuring company
in the great city of forkhedia city lies the headquarters of the forkheads adventuring company a group of people who adventure for great justice

technicly they are only meant to accept neutral good adventures but for the most part nobody fucking cares if your anything next to lawfull neutral and they never bother to check if somebody is evil

in fact they dont really have much in the way of entrance requirments at all a prospective member goes in says i wanna join your group and there name gets put in a big book

the company does send its members on missions but for the most part its members just murderhobo around

also the entire orgainisation is really really fucking incompetent
(this is retconed when we moved them from greyhawk to a demiplane now there the main adventurers of forkhedia more of a guild really)

the members have a lot of sex with each other though so that attracts a lot of people

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Mon Nov 17, 2014 10:00 pm
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
Can we have to steal a relic from a mine that got overrun with goblins?

My plan is as follows: Get a bunch of whores, tell them we're hosting a massive orgy. Then we take them out to the goblin lair and have them go in ahead of us. We don't pay them and when the goblins get distracted with raping the whores, we steal the relic and run away. Fool-proof. (Unless they already know that the mine is overrun, in which case we may suffer some expenses to get them 'cooperative'.)

(I also like sci-fi. Just sayin'. We could explore some alternate time periods throughout the course of this.)

Edit: Also, I was told there would be a pole here! Now where is my stripper going to dance? Get it. Cause polls.

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Mon Nov 17, 2014 10:13 pm
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
well that sounds fun you will need some presuasion checks but it will not be a high dc

that said i assume you mean sluts not whores

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Mon Nov 17, 2014 10:17 pm
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
Anything with a pulse and tits. We will call it the Great Whore Army.

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Mon Nov 17, 2014 10:22 pm
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
oh wait you are talking about whores

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Mon Nov 17, 2014 10:25 pm
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
i have the perfect relic in mind im off to create the first adventure

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Mon Nov 17, 2014 10:30 pm
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
Is it Cleopatra's lead (the element) dildo, with functional mercury (also the element) jizz?

Mercury jizz would be so cool. Holy shit. If you could somehow avoid dying from how toxic it is, your dick would be spewing what looks like liquid silver every time you came. If I were a god this would 100% be a feature I would include on my mortal shell.

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Mon Nov 17, 2014 10:41 pm
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
well i suppose you may be able to research a spell for it if you make a wizard

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Tue Nov 18, 2014 12:01 am
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
some info on how the game will probably flow

you will likely get a lot of free bonus for assorted things (off the top of my head lich loved will be a free feat you will just have to perform the actions required for it)
magic items magic items everywhere
expect to be overpowered
except to get ploped into a few wars
expect a lot of planer travel and quite a bit of crossing the plane of shadow to reach alternate material planes
it will be pretty easy to get a resuretion
expect sex
expect insanity
expect fun
expect knowledge checks

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Tue Nov 18, 2014 12:18 am
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
ok while i wait for characters to come in lets start up the first asingment

a gnome walks into the offices of the forkheads adventuring company wearing a robe and adorned in gold jewelry

"hello i come seeking assitnace from your group" the gnome calls out

a group of goblins has overtaken an important mine and we require assistance recovering it or at least its contents

the mine was created to dig out an important artifact however just as we reached it the goblins attacked and the miners were forced to flee

the mine inself is not important it would be handy if it can be retaken as we spent a lot of money for the right to dig in that land but the important thing is this gem

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Tue Nov 18, 2014 12:32 am
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
now the thing with this mine is that we knew where the gem we sought was so its a pretty simple layout

the entrance is in the side of a large rock from where we dug down at a low angle

at the bottem of the descent the tunnel extends for 20 feet and then opens up into a large cavern 60 feet square where the miners lived and equipment was stored

we knew what direction the gem was in but not how far so we just mined towards it problem is the miners had to leave in such a hurry that they arent sure how long the tunnel goes for it is at least 300 feet and it could be as much as 350 feet

please can you help us with this task

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Tue Nov 18, 2014 12:38 am
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
as payment if you retrive the gem you can keep all the other things we have mined except for the gem

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Tue Nov 18, 2014 12:53 am
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
For the spell do you just want to ejaculate mercury or do you want the lead penis as well

Or do you just want to make the previously described dildo

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Tue Nov 18, 2014 11:45 pm
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
Better yet, I want it bronzed. Balls and all. Full feeling though.

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Tue Nov 18, 2014 11:49 pm
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Post Re: the forkheads adventuring company
Ok then once the powers back I will go through my PDFs and work it out

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Tue Nov 18, 2014 11:56 pm
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